Mommy please take my hand, hold it tight.  I’m scared I won’t live through the night.  These voices speak to me tell me to do things I don’t want to do.  Their force, the powerful voices commends me to tell you this truth.  I don’t want to live anymore.  My behavior has caused so much pain.  I don’t want you to cry anymore, but these powerful voices I can’t ignore anymore.  If you can just sleep here tonight and hold me tight maybe they will go away.

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I’m sorry I made you cry.  I’m sorry I told those lies but these powerful voices inside won’t let me go.  I try to be like you want but these powerful voices inside won’t let me go.  It’s easier to fight with you and dad than fight the voices inside my head.  The demon is here to take me away. So confused, so tired I just want to end it all.  Mommy please tell me you love me and hold me tightly.  Don’t ever let me go no matter please don’t ever let me go.

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I normally end my blogs and short stories with “be kind, be creative, drink responsibly” this story is inspired by real life event.  I don’t have any words to close with other than this if you or a loved is suffering from mental illness or disorder or displaying suicidal thoughts please seek help.

la fin

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