Category: Featured

THE JOKER AFFECT

WARNING: this blog post is of the opinion of my own. I am not a licensed physician. I do not give out any medical advice. If you are experiencing suicidal thoughts or self harm call 911 or contact The National Suicide Prevention Hotline at (800) 273-8255.

Introduction

Why do we show so much passion for super villainous characters? Maybe it’s because we see a little of ourselves in the developmental of their story. I find it interesting the most villains don’t start out horrifying scary. There’s a backstory to the madness that usually find our antagonist struggling with some type of mental illness. Unlike our hero whose moral fabric is the driving force. It’s an delegate balance between the two whose common ground is both struggling with some form of mental illness or disorder. It’s the villains backstory that drives this point. Separating the human aspect from the morally corrupt you find the bullying affect that we all can relate to. We willingly root for a successful outcome for these villains even knowing how horribly bad it all turns out. We all have a little Joker in us.

WARNING: The Joker movie is very graphic and display disturbing scenes that can be triggers for an episodes. Exercise caution when viewing.

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13 REASONS WHY

Introduction

Hello all you keepers or words, today blog post hits a bit closer to home as it involves dealing with mental health specifically my diagnosis. I have been very open about my bipolar disorder in doing so blogging about something that is so personal it’s hard I’m not going to lie but being on this constant rollercoaster ride trying to seek answers to new questions it’s tough. Through therapy and support I learned some valuable tools that helps when in the mist of an episode.

This blog is based upon my personal perspective and experience dealing with a disorder.
The research of this blog is for informational purpose.
I am not a doctor or a license healthcare worker.
If you are experiencing thoughts of suicide or self harm call 911 immediately.

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ANOTHER MASS SHOOTING It’s Time For Gun Control!

Hello all you masters and mistress of words, here we are again on the mass shooting merry-go-round. This time America got a triple. Two mass shootings within hours of each other and a week from the Gilroy Garlic Festival shooting. I’m not going to give a lecture on the importance of gun control because if you read this blog, you’ll see that this debate has been going since the 1966 starting with the shooting at University of Texas.

This blog showcast many of the heartbreaking mass shootings from Columbine to the most tragic Sandy Hook. I often ask the question “how many people have to die before our Government will act. With each administration taking to social media giving a heartfelt condolences, no one bothers to actually come up with more stricter gun laws to prevent more mass shootings.

No trouble individual should has such easy access to guns. Maybe its up to us to take action to help prevent another loss.

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NETFLIX 40 Binge-Worthy Shows To Add To Your Watch List

Hello all you warriors of words, with all the things going on in everyday life it’s cool to take some time and sit spending the weekend binge watching TV. There’s so many streaming services like Hulu, Amazon and HBO its hard to pick what service to watch. Hulu offers great shows like Handmaid’s Tale or HBO’s Games of Thrones and Amazon’s Good Omens and so many different shows TV watching has become more difficult.

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THE MERRY-GO-ROUND

Today is the start of another work week.  I been having such anger and I know why.  It’s getting harder for me to function and my chipper happy-go-lucky self has all but disappeared.  I feel so alone even though I’m standing in a plaza filled with people. My Chum and his band mates are knocking at the stage door demanding I should let them in.  It’s a concert I don’t want to attend.  I’m having difficulty expressing these range of emotions.  I see the signs, you know to stay positive in the darkness even my candy wrapper has a positive message “Be fearlessly authentic” really?

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The loving kind

strawberrycaz

It’s that time of year again when the world is filled with reminders of “love”.

Actually, that “love” is a complete lie. It’s not real is it?

Essentially, the shops are filled with reminders to buy things.

Cards, chocolates, flowers, stuffed toys, or if you’re Marks and Spencer, a love heart shaped sausage.

Show someone you love them by buying them something. That’s what we’re being told isn’t it?

I’ve always got a bit annoyed about it all because at a very basic level I don’t like being told what to do.

Over and above that, a stuffed rabbit holding a love heart won’t make me feel more or less loved. And anyone who spends £50 on a bouquet of roses is actually insane.

It’s commercialism and a con. Forced.

Love does not come from the thing that’s been bought, but it comes from the act of giving the thing.

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CRASH DIET FOR THE MIND

“I don’t allow myself to be human therefore my feelings of hurt, frustration and anger don’t have any value.  This process invalidates me as a person. That’s the one thing I truly dislike about myself.”

download (1)Yesterday my Chum paid me a visit.  True to rock star form, my Chum wasn’t alone.  This time Chum brought band mates Manic, Doubt and Panic. Together this dynamic foursome tore the hotel room apart. It was a complete meltdown to the point I had to call my safe person who always pulls me back from the ledge. My meltdown was beyond hitting my trigger the red brick wall, I ran smack dead into it, through it and over the edge.  Hanging on by the grip of my fingers I placed the call. I haven’t had that kind of breakdown in a while. My problem is I let things build up until I blow my top a trait I’m working on overcoming, however, I did see this one coming.  At this point lacking control, there’s really little to do. I buckled up, stayed on the run-away train bracing for the wreck and hoping for the best.

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LOST IN TRANSLATION

“My head feels like a monopoly game rolling the dice rounding go collecting two-hundred dollars hoping not to land on Boardwalk or Park Place” 

monopoly-game-board_127525

Hello all you wonderful wizards of words, today blog post may not be as witty, or funny as past post. I don’t have any smart words of wisdom or no clever intriguing headlines. Nope just me just a stripped down to the core, me raw and real no makeup, no mask nothing to hide. I don’t know why I’m inclined to go down this road, it’ pure insanity but there’s a purpose behind the madness really only one of inspiration.  In this blog I will touch upon somethings that have trigger my little Chum.  Yes folks we’re going to jump around but I promise you once you’re off the merry-go-round you will fully understand my thinking process.

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MY CHUM

depression-im-fine

“The Stigma of Depression”
Ashley Laderer

Today I feel the weight of the world crashing down on me like a ton of bricks. This heaviness is like an underdog wrestler pinning down an opponent winning the match.  Unlike the wrestler, this is a match I won’t win today.  This weight slowly grows & morphing into an uncontrollable desperation. Some days this desperation is far off in the distant allowing me tiny bit of joy but today this desperation I often refer to as “my chum” is here to stay.  

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LACKING THE WORDS

This short is dedicated to you my beautiful babies Joshy, MoMo, Little Steve, Jay-Bird, NoNo, Mara & Monie who aren’t shy to be bold & to dream big reaching the stars & beyond. May your light grow brighter & shine bigger. I love you to the moon & back & beyond.

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