This post is of the opinion of Sunny Larue. Sunny Larue is not a licensed healthcare physician nor gives any medical advice. If you are experiencing suicidal thoughts or self harm call 911 or contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (800) 273-8255
Hello all you magical wizards of words, today’s post is inspired by writing prompt “sorrow” and the effects of this emotion has on the mentally health challenged. This short was written when I was seventeen a year after I was diagnosed. James Taylor music heavily influenced my writings Fire and Rain is one song that I related to. The line “Suzanne the plans they made put an end to you” is in reference to childhood friend Suzanne Schnerr suicide. I tweaked it a bit but it’s interesting to see the difference in feelings from the late eighties as a teen and today as a forty something adult.
Continue reading “FIRE AND RAIN”
Spinning around on the turntable, as we (my friend and I) sit listening to High N’ Dry album by Def Leppard in celebration of a new 2020 world tour featuring the reunion of Motley Crue and Poison, Mirror Mirror, Look Into My Eyes comes on and we’re in awl of the amazing sound blaring from the speakers. Joe’s sings “Gonna have to smash the glass”, my buddy says to me “it’s a fool who can admit defeat.” My response is “if this is true then why do we run from our reflection in the mirror?” Hello all you Santa’s little helpers today’s blog is inspired by Def Leppard’s song Mirror Mirror Look Into My Eyes and why we run from our reflection in the mirror. There are many reasons why we run but the main reason is we don’t like to face the truth.
Continue reading “MIRROR MIRROR”
Driving down this road hatred fills my eyes. Seeing red, I can feel the flames burning inside. Waiting for that one slip up to release the beast that dances within. Cool as the morning dew sweetly fills the air, still can’t stop this living hell I am in. The more I drive down this dangerous road the more I feel alive and ready to fight. Lying in wait, to pull the pin to explode. Looking in the rear view mirror I see the road I left behind. Plenty of rocks left in my wake to over take that turn. It’s all in the past now as I look forward still reeling with this anger. Coming to the stop light blinker on left turn, then another left turn pulling into the drive of the fortress of destitute, realizing another nightmarish hell. Seeing that brick wall I’m about to come crashing into just accepting this is my fate.
Continue reading “ROAD RAGE”
I don’t know where I am in the grand scheme of things. My head feels like a merry-go-round spinning in circles a never-ending circle. I want to stop, I need to stop but I can won’t you help me. Everything hurts, every words, laugh and cry is painful too sensitive to act too sad to be happy I need love to light the way. I am a prisoner to this fate bleak drowning deeper into the sea of void sinking lower than Moby Dick’s occupants. Not lacking in faith, wishing for a band-aid to cover the scab I’m slowing picking at, screaming in a crowded room with no one looking up not evening giving a glance I’m here with this demon. A constant companion these days speaks to me in ways no one can comprehend. Scared no, just concerned that my mind is no longer my own. Fighting the good fight staying above water in the hopes that one day this dynamic dance will be done.
Continue reading “HELP ME”
Exploding into the midnight sky burning bright flying high, supernova reaches levels intensifying the mind. All of my senses engulfed by the flames, you stand there with this look on your face as if we’ve met before. White hot radioactive embers burning brightly through this space lifting levels of an a high then sinking deeper into the depths of the void. My soul set a blaze my light burning so brightly it’s blinding, the white heated embers reaching every level possible to let you know of the rebirth. I alike the Phoenix arose from the ash, I’m alive. Reborn just as in life I am birth, I live and I die. This is my exit goodnight and goodbye.
Continue reading “SUPERNOVA”
A world without your love is the world I find myself dwelling in. The lights were turned off when you closed your eyes forever. Alone here in the darkness I wait for you in my dreams. In anticipation seeing your beautiful face. Longing to hear your soft voice whisper those beautiful three words “I Love You”. I live in this world cold cruel and dead without your kind touch, without your encouragement. I don’t want to stay in this world without you anymore. I want to be where you are, dancing in your light. I want to stay in this light embraced in your loving arms within your unconditional love only a mother can give.
Continue reading “A WORLD WITHOUT LOVE”
This post is inspired by writing prompt 86 write about something green – enjoy
Green is the color of envy or so they say. I wear green every day. Ask me if I’m green with envy and I would say HELL YES. I’m green with envy trying to pick the winning lotto numbers I can’t seem to buy. I’m green with envy at a job that don’t I’m alive. Sitting at a desk day in and day out mindless nothing not even messing about. Working for a wage that barely covers the rent. Living here in this expensive hell you’re better off spending you pennies on a tent. It’s the uber driver who takes you on a ride to voodoo land. Either stopping a few feet ahead taking the next fare behind you or driving the most indirect routes you sitting in the back watching the money run out.
Continue reading “GREEN”
Mommy please take my hand, hold it tight. I’m scared I won’t live through the night. These voices speak to me tell me to do things I don’t want to do. Their force, the powerful voices commends me to tell you this truth. I don’t want to live anymore. My behavior has caused so much pain. I don’t want you to cry anymore, but these powerful voices I can’t ignore anymore. If you can just sleep here tonight and hold me tight maybe they will go away.
Continue reading “MOMMY TAKE MY HAND”
The rain falls gently touching the skin of the naked earth. The trees stripped of their leaves exposing their bare bark. Nature enjoying the gentle rain fall like a woman taking a long hot shower. Soaked, the tall green grass shiver in the brisk cool winter breeze and I alone with my thoughts watching as mother nature give us a show taking center stage delighting us with her beauty. So overwhelmed, I can’t help but to feel small in this equation as I am too naked.
Continue reading “NAKED”