Tag: Mental Illness

DIARY OF A MANIC DEPRESSIVE

Twenty-nineteen started with an uncertainty I had no idea of what’s to come but I spent the last few weeks of twenty-eighteen stressing about it.  I don’t know why but I have this sick obsession of trying to control the future.  I worry about things and events that haven’t happened yet.  The anxiety is quite overwhelming but what makes this worse is that I put myself in this position.  I willingly make myself go nuts trying to control something that is uncontrollable.  

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FACE OF A DEPRESSED MIND

Hello Kings and Queens of the blogging community, wow last week been one hell of a ride.  Trying to play catch-up it’s very dawnty to say the lease. This past week I had a birthday to work through.  I always get very emotional around my birthday.  Just found out a friend passed away.  He was truly a kind soul with a big heart.  There’s not enough words on this planet that I can use to describe how brilliant this person was.  Still dealing with the aftermath of work place bullying.  All the while trying to keep my “Chum” and his band mates “Manic” “Doubt” and “Panic” at bay.  Yes its an overwhelming week of highs and lows and despite it all surprisingly I survived.

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PRETTY

They say beauty is in the eye of the beholder and yet as I stand here looking at the mess in the mirror I beg to differ.  I’m not a beauty nor do I feel pretty.  What I see is quite the opposite.  I see ugly, useless, dirty person with no future.  I wish I can be pretty, as pretty as the actress that grace the silver screen.  I wish I can be pretty, as pretty as those models who are splashed on the cover of sports magazines.  I wish I can be pretty, as pretty as the girl sitting across from me on the bus.  I wish I had better eyes to see what you see a beautiful girl.

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